As a way of explaining my absence for the last three quarters of a year, my sister passed away from metastatic cancer in September. Deborah was my best friend, my biggest cheerleader and such a good person. She fought cancer like a boss for two and a half years, and when the doctors said there was nothing else they could do, she went fast.
When something like that happens, it makes you question and evaluate everything. You wonder why God wouldn’t answer prayers for healing in a way that you would have liked. You wonder why he chooses to heal some people, but not the ones closest to you. You have to come to grips with what you believe about God, and learn to trust him even when things don’t make sense. You learn to let him comfort you with his perfect peace.
The death of a loved one also makes you evaluate your own life. It makes you weed out the things that drag you down and let go of the things that really don’t matter. It makes you hold on tighter to the people you love.
Deborah’s death also made me think about writing and the importance of our stories. When our lives are over, our clothes don’t matter; they are bagged up and given to charity. What is in our purses or wallets is no longer valuable; they are cleaned out and thrown away. Our bank accounts don’t matter; they are emptied out and closed. Our hair style, shoe collection or decorations don’t matter–they will eventually turn to dust.
The only thing that matters is our stories.
In our grieving, we shared stories about Deborah’s humor…her OCD issues…her generosity…and her love. We talked about things we did, ways she helped us, and how she made us feel. Those are her legacy. And it’s all we have left of her.
It’s the stories of our trials and triumphs that people will remember us by.
Your story is important for you, for the ones you love, and even for those who don’t know you.
Writing is cathartic and it will help you make sense of your world and your challenges. Writing will help you heal.
For others, the experiences you’ve shared and the lessons you’ve learned are your story. They will help your loved ones grieve when you are gone. But before that, they will help others grow or laugh.
Your insecurities will try to make you believe that your experiences and insights, the things you do, or what you think don’t really matter. But that’s wrong. It’s all that matters.
I don’t mean to be macabre. I am just sharing what has been on my mind; that is the point of writing, after all.
So what are you doing about sharing your story?
If you are writing it–or if you want to write it, I can help you with my new writing coaching program.
If you have written it, but you don’t know what to do next to get it published, I can help you produce and distribute it as a traditional book or eBook.
If you have your book published (or almost published) and you want to learn how to effectively market it so people will buy it, I can help you do that too!
If you want to take the next step for your book, contact me here and we can set up a call to talk about where you are and where you want to go next. Of course there is no charge for this call.
It’s nice to be back from my introspection and I look forward to talking with you about your book!
P.S. maybe you can help me as I redesign my offerings; in what area of self publishing do you most need help? Ask your question below and I will respond with an answer that you can implement right away!